Recently I wrote about our tendency to miss moments while capturing them on our devices. You can read about that HERE.
The issue of social media and “selfies” (Which was the word of the year in 2013 for the Oxford Dictionary) – are typically a cultural and generational gaps. So here are a few thoughts for both sides of that gap:
For those who love social media:
- Make sure you aren’t missing the moment trying to capture the moment (the point of yesterday’s post).
- Occasionally ask yourself – why am I really wanting to post this photo? Is there something deeper I don’t want to admit? Knowing your own selfish tendencies – could there be a motive you don’t want to admit to yourself?
- Could you be communicating to the person you are with that you are more interested in making sure others know you are having a great time rather than just having a great time?
- I have told my daughters that I hope they end up marrying someone who is so “into” them that they aren’t thinking about sharing every unique moment with their social media worlds. And I want my future sons-in-law to tell my daughters how awesome they are – not tell everyone else through social media how awesome my daughters are.
For those who dislike social media:
- Assume the best. Remember that those in their 50s, 60’s and 70’s have photo albums – with real photos that had to get developed (ask your parents, they can tell you about it). Those in their 30’s and 40’s have Shutterfly photo albums that they physically hold, but the photos are digital. Those in their teens and 20’s – social media is their photo album. They likely will never own a photo album their hold in their hands. So be kind and don’t assume you know their motive. They may not be trying to show off. They may be storing their long-term photo memories there.
- Be gracious. What really is worse: someone who narcissisticly posts photos on social media in an attempt to draw attention to themselves, or you stalking and judging those who do? If you can’t control your judgmental spirit – get off social media. If it is someone you have a close relationship with, have a kind conversation asking lots of questions. If you aren’t close to them – leave them alone or get off social media. Don’t assume their narcissism is worse than your judgmental pride.
- Remember history. There are some things from your generation that previous generations didn’t “get.” They weren’t right or wrong. There were good and bad things about them. But you were frustrated with previous generations judging something that you enjoyed, and it was annoying. Remember that when you share your dislike of social media.
Oh, but by the way – future sons-in-law… your future mother-in-law will want you to post photos of your honeymoon travels. She wants to be included and loves to hear you say how wonderful her daughter is. So, for my wife’s sake, ignore all I’ve said. And good luck trying to please us both. Welcome to our family!